So Annoying

March 11, 2019

So I realized that I've never shared any of my terrible/annoying/bad sex stories. Since I've been gone for a while I figured why not share one of my recent annoying experiences. Now, this isn't a sexy sex story, but I really had to get it off my chest. (This is me venting lol)

 

I was talking to this guy and we had been fucking consistently for a couple months. I had known him prior from a swinger event I attended a few years ago, and then we started fucking outside of the parties. Then I cut him off, but recently brought him back for the dick. And guess what? He's cut off again lol.

Here is what happened...

 

We agreed to hangout on Friday night. I initially didn't feel like it, because he's actually really annoying. He talks but never makes any sense. He makes a point to show off "designer" or nice shit that he has, and that shit is a turn off. He cuts me off when I talk assuming he knows more than me and I assure you he doesn't. He's not even that attractive, but he likes to mention the women who he be fucking with and what not. HE'S ANNOYING!!! But ya'll his dick is AMAZING! Some of the best dick I've had in a while. The entire sexual experience with him is pretty spectacular. He be having me dickmitized.

So boom, he arrives and already he's annoying me. Before I could close my door he tryna hug me. I'm like "Damn nigga, give me a minute.' Let me shut my door. lol

Then I'm finishing up some miscellaneous task for SheOrgasms so I tell him to chill and I'll be over there in a second. He decides he wants to come help.

 

"Let me help you, you go sit and chill" 

 

"Well, I really don't feel like showing you how to do it. I got it. You can go chill and smoke."

 

"No, here I got it. Go sit down, let me help." 

 

 I see he's not taking no for an answer so I briefly show him what to do and I go sit down.  I peek over there and he fucking shit up tryna do things differently.

 

"Here, I got it. I don't really need any help. Thank you though."

"Yo you be trippin, I'm just tryna help and you getting an attitude."

 

"I'm not getting an attitude, I'm just confused as to why you're forcing your help on me." I'm simply putting caps on bottles. I DON'T NEED ANY HELP!!

 

"I like what you got going with your business, I wanna be part of it. You never wanna talk business with me, you just be tryna fuck. I'm deeper than that."

 

"Oh." (Note, I don't need no nigga tryna involve himself in the business I grew from the bottom up all by myself!)

Long convo short, we argue about him helping me for another 5 minutes. I'm finally done, so we go sit on the couch and smoke the blunt he rolled. I'm tryna get rid of the annoyance levels he's created within me.

 

We get in to another argument about my Self Pleasure Journal. He grabs it inquiring about it. So I excitingly grab it from him to give him a little presentation of what it's all about. This nigga snatched it back and says "I'll take it home and read it, I'd like to check it out"....

 

"Again, this is a JOURNAL not a novel. There is nothing for you to read or check out.."

 

"Yea, I get it. It's your journal."

 

"No, it's not my personal journal. It's a journal for women to reflect in. If you would have let me finish speaking, you would have understood what it is"

 

"Let me read it. I wanna read it."

 

Ya'll, I snatch my book back and go put in on the tv stand. 

"Forget it, let's not talk about any of my projects."

 

So now I'm not even slightly in the mood to fuck. He continuously tryna have conversation with me but every convo turns into bickering. Because HE DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE!!! He notices that my responses are super short, and non-engaging.

"So do you even like me?"

 

"Listen, I've already told you I don't like people, it's nothing personal. Im selfish, I'm about my money, my happiness, and satisfying my vagina"

 

"But we be kicking it often and you mean to tell me you don't like me even though we spend a lot of time together?"

 

"I try not to kick it too much, I really just try to get a little foreplay in and then fuck. I like your dick."

 

"Woooowww. Ok."

 

He pause and we sitting there looking like..

"So, I'm not even in the mood any more to be honest." I know he just drove about 35 minutes to see me, and he was ready to get it in, but I wasn't trying to anymore.

 

"You want me to leave?"

 

"I'm about to watch a movie, so if you wanna stay and watch the movie cool."

 

40 minutes into the movie he starts kissing on me and rubbing on me. I disregard it. Then he starts rubbing on my spot. So I get up with the attitude of 'Ok, let's just fuck and get this out of the way so you can take yo ass home.'

 

He hops his happy ass up and undresses. He bends me over my ottoman and rubs his dick down my pussy lips.

I was a little wet but not my normal wet and ready slip'n'slide. He starts roughly fucking me, I guess he thinks he's teaching me a lesson. But I'm not really mentally in it. Normally this would feel amazing. But it's super mediocre right now. I immediately dry up.

 

He moves down to give me head to increase my lubrication. The head is good, so I'm slightly getting back into the mood. 

 

 

 

"I want it in my ass." I figured since I'm gonna ghost him after this, let me get a good anal session out of this. Also because my pussy wasn't interested anymore. He switches the condom and I grab some extra lube. He slowly enters my ass and it's actually feeling pretty good. His dick is so big so I didn't think I'd be able to handle it.

 

So that last for a while but then I realized my mind started to drift away. So now I'm over that.

 

He takes off the condom and tells me to suck it. I make my way to his beautiful dick to say my goodbyes. I suck the soul out of his dick. He's moaning, cussing, curling his toes, flenching, everything. I pull back after about a measly 3 minutes of dick sucking.

 

He leans back on the couch and signals me to get on top. I face the tv so I can continue to watch my movie.

 

So now I'm really drying up because I'm not paying him any attention and he knows it. He tells me to turn around to look at him.

 

"I can see you from here." I can tell he wants me to face him completely. 

 

He lifts me off his dick and forces my body around. I go with it.

 

I'm on my tippy toes on the couch bouncing on his dick. He's staring at me with intense eye contact. Remind you, he's not cute so I turn my head away. I don't wanna share intimate eye contact with you anymore. The more someone annoys me, the more unattractive they become. He tries to keep making me give him eye contact. 

"I'm sorry." I hop up and go to the bathroom to pee and wipe myself.

 

As I'm walking back out he's walking toward me with his hard dick.

 

"Here, come suck on it."

 

"I'm good." I start putting my clothes on.

 

He then gets the signal and starts to dress himself as well. 

 

"K, well drive safe." I signal him to head the fuck out. Now we staring at each other like...

 

"Umm.. Ok." He slams my door and leaves.

 

The next day he text me Good afternoon. I don't reply.

5 hours later he messages me: I don't wanna assume anything, but you done talking to me?

 

I reply: Correctomundo

 

 

Moral of this story. Ladies don't have sex if you really don't want to. Don't have sex with someone you don't even like (even if the dick is A1). Sex is a large percentage mental. If your mind isn't in it, your pussy won't be either. I thought I stopped doing this dumb shit years ago but apparently not. Good dick will have you making dumb ass decisions.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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